All The News of the Day

The cricket world is wonderful place but proof positive that art imitates life. Did you know, for instance, that Brett Whitely was pretty handy painter until his wife left him and then he painted a masterpiece.

Administrators, regardless of the country or countries they purport to represent are never slow to tread in the horse shit once the horse has bolted.

In Pakistan, almost everyone who toured Australia this summer has been fined, suspended or cast scornful glances. To make sure they cover all the ground they should have first looked over before the players trod in it, some, like Shahid Afridi are being punished twice for offences just to make sure. As a result, no one is talking to anyone and as usual, no one seems to know what is going on in Pakistan cricket. Still, no change there and what a glowing example it is even down to the local club level. Ah, self-interest. How well it drives the decision making at the local club. It would be otherwise called avaris but its too hard to spell.

In England, the Second XI competition is to have its 40 over games (previously F4's I guess) turned into four innings of 20 overs. Lord knows what you call that? halfF40 maybe or 2T20? As most of the second eleven bowlers will be downsized to the status of pie chuckers, perhaps they could consider calling it the Four & Twenties comp? What a terrific way to take the game forward. Tests could be reduced to four set days with one innings each day giving South Africa the edge should they chose to race the latest sensation from the Veld, the left handed Rilee Rossouw into the side. Yesterday he almost Barry Richards first class record for the most runs in a day by a Sarth Efriken. Better still, play Tests as a one day game starting at 2pm, under the Four & Twenties format with eleven batsman a side and bowling machines at one end.

What a spectacle. Still, we need to cater for those who wander through life with brains packaged by Birdseye. My only concern is that many of the spectators at these limited or even very limited overs games (now there's a coincidence in terminology) is that, as we are all born with only so many words in us which when exhausted brings on our demise ... well, how are we going to cater for corpses dropping in their seat in the midst of a mexican wave or another Dave warner six. I mean, initially we'd boo them when they don't jump up but after that I mean. Mobile morgues I guess?

Northants, wise to the new developments in English cricket, have just signed India's Phil Hughes.

Meanwile, as England prepare for their defence of the Ashes, James Anderson is still trying to understand why his knee troubles him so. Smart fella is Jimmy, judging by this quote when asked about the injury "It can be quite difficult to decipher what is a niggle and what can cause you problems - because as a bowler you are never really 100% fit. You always have a niggle or two. This one started as a niggle and just got worse and worse." Be careful Jimmy, there is a frog looking for you with a pimple on its bum.

To the real news and Dan Vettori plays his 100th Test on his home ground, starting tomorrow when the Kiwis take anoth tilt at the Aussies in Hamilton. He'll have a new old man at No 3, with Matthew Sinclair almost certain to take over from Peter Ingram. Having been on the outer from Tests for two years and at age 34, he will bring experience and toughness to the role but I'm not sure it will be enough to expect him to be the acnchor of a big NZ first innings score. Its true that two of Vettori's five hundreds have been scored here and Brendon McCullum played a strong hand but only when it was too late. When will NZ stop relying on the man in glasses to make it happen and started shoulding the lad themselves? The best news all week was the thought to include the kid Kane Williamson. For the Black Caps to grow again, they have to start growing talent. What better place to test your talent against the best?

For Australia, Watson will return and the team physio, Phil the Greek, has assured the media that as Watto has strained, torn or rupture 95% of his body already, he shouldn't miss too many more games in the future. There are, however, concerns about his camera angles.

This game will be tighter as Austalia don't care and its been a long season. They should win but they might have to raise themselves for an unexprected scrap. I fell a big hundred coming from Ponting.