Crushed, Clobbered, Flogged

Ian Bell made a long, defiant 55

There are many ways to sum up South Africa's win in the first Test at The Oval and all of them make England's chances of retaining their position high up on the ICC Test Table look exceedingly slim.

Examine them.

South Africa took twenty wickets whilst England took only two. South Africa became the first team to make consecutive double century stands in an innings against England. Hashim Amla made the highest South African Test score. South Africa made three hundreds to England's one. South Africa won by an innings. England made close to 400 and still lost by an innings. England took less wickets than new balls used.

England were hammered.

On the last day, Ian Bell and Matt Prior stood up like Englishman can and resisted. Bell controlled his desire to play strokes and batted without flourish, reducing his off side strokes against the threat posed out there by the South African quicks. He was tidy off his pads and solid in defence. His only mishap was a sharp chance to AB deVilliers from Imran Tahir, which went to the deck in a flourish and underlined the need for South Africa to field a real wicketkeeper before it costs them - that and 11 byes.

Matt Prior stayed with Bell to add 86

After Ravi Bopara conspired to bring a ball from Dale Steyn back onto his middle stump from a metre outside his off, Matt Prior spent a couple of hours with Bell and added 86 in order to force South Africa back to the crease. He is a robust fighter at the crease and played two delightful back foot drives forward of point from Jacques Kallis and several deft flicks down to fine leg but his departure just before the second new ball and Bell's departure just after, exposed a tail of bowlers who had already been irradiated by South Africa's atomic energy. Prior tried to slog sweep Tahir over mid wicket but edged sharp and high to Kallis at first slip. Much is said about Kallis'batting and bowling but the man also has buckets for hands. Bell went with the second delivery of the new cherry from Steyn, edging a poor stroke to Kallis at second slip. The glory of cricket is that he batted with such discipline yet one poor stroke, just one from 220 balls after nearly five hours ... well, that's cricket.

Steyn reminded the press of his 5-56

Tim Bresnan batted for twenty overs and remained not out but the remainder were cleaned away like crumbs swept from the table after the main meal had finished. Broad gloved Steyn down the leg side and Swann drove Steyn to cover, neither seeming to know much about what they were doing. Anderson just managed to survived in a last ditch attempt with Bresnan to avoid the innings defeat but was undone by the only ball which could claim to have been pitch assisted by Tahir - a deadly flipper which hit Anderson on his ankles. His review was the most hopeful action of any Englishman in the past four days.

What can the England selectors do before Headingley? They might consider Eoin Morgan for Bopara but in the end, the major problem was the inability of the bowlers to break through the South African top order. Remember, with all her players fully fit, this was the best side England could field. Bresnan will yield to Steve Finn but on form over the past five days, unless South Africa give their wickets away, its hard to see the change making any difference. The English attack was as affective as taking a team of eunuchs to the sexual olympics.

Winners are grinners, are South African

The regrouping for England has to be between the ears.

For South Africa, the only change has to be behind the stumps. Thami Tsolekile must come into the side. Not only does it make South Africa stronger in that position but it will return AB deVilliers, a super fielder, back into field. Jacques Rudolph or JP Duminy would be the batsman dropped. Apart from that, South Africa were perfect. Their bowlers benefited from good luck and some poor shot choices in both English innings to balls that looked otherwise innocuous but that's often the case when batsmen are put under pressure. They will have other games where they will bowl much better for far less return but Steyn and Morkel certainly bowled themselves back into form.

In a three Test series, losing the first is a severe handicap but the fat lady isn't warming up just yet.

Not surprisingly, Hashim Amla was named man of the match.

Session Count: England 4, South Africa 10

The Second Test starts at Headingley, Leeds, on August 2nd.

Postscript: The classic Warneism for the day happened in the 63rd over when Prior dabbed to the off side and ran. Duminy sent the ball to a diving deVilliers whose forward momentum made removing the bails impossible. Warne's reaction was to castigate Duminy for a poor throw which had cost his side a run out. Replays showed the ball zooming an inch over the middle stump right to deVilliers diving gloves and Bell well short of his ground. Directors never show the red faces of their commentators, not even the dumb ones.